I have never been a night owl. Though the past 5 years have been different. Less cause of work and more cause of worry I have been up at the wee hours of the night woken up hardly minutes after I tucked myself in bed for a beauty sleep. Yes, it was a living nightmare.

No amount of zoning off, reading, chanting the mantras that usually calm me, not even Twitter (where I’m perched most part of my day) would succeed in soothing me. I would turn off the light in hope that finally I’d find peace and would tire myself enough staring at the false ceiling in my room to fall asleep. Only to be proved wrong time after time.

That was when, one rather warm summer night, I plugged my headphones into my iPad and tuned to YouTube. Browsing for new movie trailers and following the suggestions that popped up to keep my mind as dormant as I possibly could. After a couple of trailers and songs, I spotted episodes of Koffee With Karan from the older seasons. The first video I watched, was the video of the rapid-fire round featuring Shah Rukh Khan, Kajol and Rani Mukherjee that I remembered having watched closely when the show was aired on TV (strangely I couldn’t find the video today).

Being a Shah Rukh Khan (SRK) fan girl, that I still am, I browsed to find episodes featuring him through the seasons. In no time, SRK’s razor-sharp wit, ability to unabashedly poke fun at himself, being pompous sometimes, getting philosophical in ways that made perfect sense, his charismatic charm and how he comes across as a well-read man relaxed me like I had not felt in a long time.

I had started watching around midnight and the next time I looked at the computer clock, it was 3:45 a.m. And I had not noted the time fly, held by the spell of Bollywood gossip or perhaps by SRK’s charm.

At this point, I would like to mention that though am not much of a Karan Johar movie fan, am a huge fan of his wit, wisdom and the habit of overusing the word ‘conjecture‘ in everything he says.

I often take pride in saying that gossips bore me to death and I can’t gossip even if I were paid to do so. However, Koffee With Karan is the only exception to this rule. The show is loaded with filmy gossip, cheesy lines and lot of drama, yet it gives me a  high just like a midnight dessert binge gives a sugar high to those who crave at the wee hours.

Over the past few years, I have watched old seasons of Koffee With Karan so many times that by now I know all episodes by heart. It is quite like raiding the refrigerator every 10 minutes hoping the scene inside would have changed, only to discover otherwise. But, still the calming, happy feeling that envelopes me is still the very same I had felt the first night I had watched it on YouTube.

Tonight while preparing dinner, my mind was racing in all possible directions wondering what to base my today’s NaBloPoMo post on. That’s when I recalled that season 5 of Koffee With Karan goes on air today and the premiere episode shall feature SRK. I could immediately sense myself motor through the chores, get everything set and ready for Monday and be totally free to watch the show at peace.

And that’s exactly what I did tonight. Savor my favorite midnight binge dessert three hours early, yet feel the same euphoric, happy feeling like I do at those unearthly hours.

Ironically though, I have never been patient enough to watch all episodes of the show while the season is on air. But I do watch them all when I really need to halt the train of thoughts and break free from the monotony of life.

It’s highly unusual but maybe my mind meditates with a generous dose of the forbidden fruit. The  Bollywood Gossip.

And you, my dear reader now know a secret, I have held close to my heart for years.

The song on my mind: Raat baaki, baat baaki ~ Namak Halal