My darling Pari,
The very first question that comes to any mind when they hear about the birth of a baby is, “whom does he/she look like?”
When you were born things were no different. Your Nana believed that you looked exactly like me.Your Nani was too busy thanking the Almighty for having you safe and healthy in her arms to tax her mind to answer any of these questions. I was serious and in ICU the first ten hours and when I finally got to see you, my heart knew it one look that you resembled your dad almost completely.
Whom you resembled initially and who will you finally look like isn’t what is important. I decided to write this letter to you because I had a few strange feelings and observations of those very initial days when you were born. The puzzle of guessing whom your eyes had gone on and whom did you take your nose from were the major small-talk topics of everyone who visited us in the hospital.
While I struggled with my health in those initial days, the person whom I waited for to tell me whom did you look like was your father. I was really curious to know what he felt and how he would react on seeing you. I personally feel, it is a great privilege to be chosen by the Almighty to shoulder the responsibility of being a parent and to add to its’ glory the fact that the baby looks so very like you.
At last the wait ended and your father and grandfather did visit us.I was eagerly watching them to note how they’ll react on seeing you the very first time. I must say, I was hurt. It felt like someone stabbed me when I saw the hasty look they gave you and soon got busy in the things that mattered more than you or me.
Though they did mention that since your Nana (my dad) had mentioned to them on phone that you liked me they too thought it was the case. At that point of time, I wondered, how could someone not recognize anyone who looked exactly like him? It was something unbelievable, yet your father actually ignored that fact. The same holds true for his father. Your grandfather must have seen your dad as young as they saw you. The stark resemblance should have been unmissable, but still they missed on noting it.
It was surprising as well as shocking. I didn’t have any energy to think more about it then. But, this is something that literally stuck in my mind. I haven’t been able to forget this incident, though in reality it literally holds no significance. The sequence of events that followed that time did clear to me lot of hidden motives your father and his family had.
Just because you were a girl, your paternal grandparents didn’t seem to have any interest in anything related to you. Your grandmother (paternal) hasn’t yet seen her grand-daughter (born to her only son). Though all of these are very painful facts, but in retrospect they tell me, it’s good for people with such narrow minds and senseless thoughts to stay away from us, forever.
Ever since I made up my mind to part ways from your father, these small painful incidents have gently tiptoed away from my mind. Though I still remember them (the incidents) all as if they happened a couple of minutes ago, but now they fail to disturb me. The associated hurt is gradually fading away.
I love you more than anything I ever loved in my life. Many years from today, when you’ll read this account, don’t be hurt by what people did to us back then. Remember the love your mum, your Nana and Nani had for you from the time you were still a part of me. Learn to love life, thanking the Almighty for keeping us safe and away from the people who never understood our real worth.
With loads of love and blessings,
The Song on my mind: