Imagine a newborn infant.
The baby is born with the capability to meet its needs and is fully in tune with its body.
They cry when they want food – no matter what time, day or night.
They’ll let us know when they’re hot or cold.
They’ll toilet when they need to.
When we’re born, we’re programmed to meet our needs.
As we grow up, we get taught to ignore our needs.
To ‘control’ our body rather than listening to it.
Slowly but surely, we begin ‘listening’ to the voices outside of us to know when, what and how much needs to be done.
Food stops being something we get when we’re hungry and starts being something we get when it’s ‘mealtime’.
The portions of food begin to be decided by others – our caregivers or the serving sizes suggested on the packs or of the restaurants.
Some foods are reserved for bribes or ‘rewards’.
Some foods are encouraged at certain social settings- picnics, parties, movies, birthdays, festivals and more.
Some of us tell our body what it needs rather than letting it tell us.
At school, going to the toilet has to be scheduled.
We’re taught to ‘train our bladder’ to align with a timetable set by someone else.
Some of us start ignoring our ‘thirst signals’ so that we don’t have to worry about it.
We might be forced to wear clothes at school or work which aren’t comfy.
We might have to wear shoes that don’t really suit the weather where we live.
We might have to wear clothes that leave us feeling too hot or too cold.
How does this impact our lives?
We learn to ‘push through’ tiredness.
We learn to ‘schedule’ breaks.
We get taught to match our sleep schedule to a 9-5 day.
Bit by bit, little by little, we learn to ‘switch off’ our needs.
We learn to ignore them.
We learn that they don’t matter.
We learn that they aren’t important.
In doing this, we often accidentally teach ourselves that we don’t matter.
We accidentally teach ourselves that we’re not important.
But learning something doesn’t make it an inarguable truth.
It’s not fact.
Little by little, we learn to ignore our needs.
That means that little by little we can learn to un-ignore them.
Because the truth is, you matter so unbelievably much.
You matter a truly unquantifiable amount.
You are important.
Your needs are important.
Your well-being is important.
Unlearning lessons that have been woven into our lives for decades isn’t easy.
Often, we think “I’m not worthy” and that’s the end of that.
But here’s the secret: we don’t have to think we’re worthy.
We don’t have to love ourselves, or even like ourselves.
We just have to be willing to give ourselves a chance.
A chance to show ourselves how worthy we are.
A chance to start unlearning
Stuck with where to start?
Start by listening.
Listen to what your body is saying.
Tune back into the messages it’s communicating.
It hasn’t given up on talking to you.
So, start by listening.
Then take it from there.
If I could do it, you too can.
I spent the past 12+ years learning, unlearning, exploring, and experimenting with different philosophies to finally streamline a system that allowed me the gift of designing my long-term health on my own terms.
It took immense courage to question the status quo, understand the impact of culture and society on my beliefs, and begin to see the true merit in showing up in the world as who I truly was.
It has taken a lot of awareness and self-reflection to reinstate my belief in my own worthiness, and my capability of living life on my own terms while still being a part of the culture and society that I belong to.
The BEST part of it all was not to lose all my physical weight, but to let go of my mental weight.
When you lose mental weight, you gain:
- Positive Self-talk
- New Outlook on Life
In the process, I realized that there is immense wisdom in our bodies.
Our bodies have all the wisdom in themselves to keep us healthy.
It is just a matter of reconnecting with our bodies’ wisdom before our life, health, and weight start shifting in our favour.
And that’s exactly what I teach in the one-on-one weight loss coaching program: Be Healthy Be You
Be Healthy Be You is not about telling women how much they should weigh (your healthy life, your decision!)
Be Healthy Be You is about equipping women to be fully empowered about their weight and able to:
• Decide & get clarity on the weight goal that is perfect for them.
• Feel empowered and able to create the weight loss results they want.
• Know exactly what to do to finally experience results they’ve always dreamed of: in a way that feels great today and in the years to come.
• Let go of feelings of deprivation, guilt, shame, worry, impossibility (& more) surrounding their weight.
• Experience weight loss results they love, PLUS the peace & freedom of a HEALTHY LIFE that is about so much more than just worrying about weight or food.
• Lose the extra weight & finally put an end to the weight struggle.
• Maintain the results with confidence.
• You get healthier without losing the true essence of what makes you, YOU.
Apply here to join the Priority Waitlist and get notified if the program is a good fit for you.
If you’re at the start of your weight loss journey, begin with the strategies that have helped lose 60 pounds and that I teach my coaching clients to achieve sustainable results. Take the FREE Weight Loss Ownership Course.
2 thoughts on “How we learn to ignore our needs & how we can un-learn it”
Wonderful post. I love your writing style. I especially like the idea of mental weight. It’s letting it go that makes us stronger. Thank you for sharing Megha 🙏
Mental weight is something we all carry and yet fail to notice or put down. Thank you for reading and sharing your perspective, AP2 🙂
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